The Next Housemate

So. I bet for years now, you’ve all been aware about this hip international reality show, Big Brother – and you didn’t even tell me about it. How thoughtful. Just imagine how big of an ignoramus I looked like when, for the first time, I got to watch a live opening of the show’s latest season in the country, “Pinoy Big Brother Double Up” last October. I had to endure a week’s worth of endless teasing from my dorm mates, who are now convinced that I come from planet Pluto. As if it wasn’t enough that I had no idea what TV shows are on these days. But I can explain: they’re all into ABS-CBN shows, while I stand by my loyalty to Ate Reg (as in Regine Velasquez) by painstakingly patronizing the other TV station, GMA. Too bad she doesn’t have a current soap, which is why I’m being successfully turned into a Kapamilya (but don’t worry Ate Reg, I’ll always love ya).

Heniway, before my babbling gets too carried away like it always does, I’m actually here to talk about PBB. So. Whaddya think about it? Would you want to be a housemate and have the rest of the world pry on what’s supposed to be your private life? Would you attempt to be friends with people you barely know or don’t like at all? Would you uphold the rules and regulations set by Big Brother himself or would you try to see how many of them you could actually break and still get away with? Would you cry like a baby in front of the whole nation when you get nominated for eviction? And, most importantly, would you do all these for a million bucks, a house and lot, numerous gadgets, endorsement deals, and a once-in-a-lifetime chance to become a star? I TOTALLY WOULD.

One of my dorm mates and I are always talking about how we want to live inside the BB house, and how we would bring fun and chaos to the world of television – in a cool, rockstar way, of course. Which is why I came up with a list of reasons why I think I’ll make a stellar housemate:

1. I’m excellent at pretend socializing. You might think I like you when I really DON’T. I’d rather you weren’t my housemate, but since you’re here and I’m here, there’s not much I can do now, is there?!

2. I give some of the best hugs in the world, precisely because I like to hug. So you can come to me when you feel like crying and need someone to hug the life out of you. Haha, kidding. But really, I’ll help you feel better. And it helps that I'm always carrying around a pack of tissues.

3. I don’t have any weird habits – at least not to my knowledge. I don’t snore or talk in my sleep, but I do make purring noises, which I’ve been told sound pretty sexy (hahaha). Oh, but I do have a lot of allergies. I don't worry about you not liking me because of them, though, 'cause I handle them with subtlety. Plus, people say my sniffing has actually become quite endearing to their ears – ONCE you get used to it.

4. I have OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder), which sometimes pushes me to clean and organize everything from dusk ‘til dawn OR to become incredibly sloppy and messy. It depends on what my brain tells me to do, but the surprise is worth watching out for.

5. I love to experiment when it comes to cooking, and most of the time, I do an awesome job at it. I’m especially good at making desserts, which means I’ll keep you high on sugar everyday. Trust me, you’ll need the energy.

6. To my girl housemates, I think you’ll like me ‘cause I am every bit a girl: I love clothes, I love shoes, I love bags, I love accessories, I read fashion magazines, I have a sturdy collection of makeup, I like dressing up, I adore flowers, I live for musicals, and there’s nothing I like better than a healthy dose of the latest chismis to brighten up my day. But not to worry now; I don’t like too much pink either.

7. To my guy housemates, fear not because even though I’m such a girly girl, I could also easily be one of the boys. I’ll work out with you (‘course, I’ll need help with the equipment), I’ll do several laps on the pool with you, I’ll play any kind of game you want, I’ll even wrestle with you – just keep your hands in the safe zones, and we won’t have a problem. I especially feel that it’s easier to open up to guys because you listen. Don't you?

8. I sing. I’ll entertain you everyday IF you want to be entertained. If not, I’ll still sing. There’s nothing you could do about it; it’s in my blood.

9. I will rock your world and the outside world (by this, I mean the viewers) with my mood swings. Do not fret; when I’m not in the mood, I usually just keep to myself, unless you’ll do something to provoke the beast within. And when I’m happy, I’m REALLY REALLY REALLY HAPPY. I’ll put sunshine all over you.

10. Even though I MAY be a prude at times, I’m pretty sneaky; I still know how to have fun. If you know what I mean. So join me and let’s live in paradise. *Wink*

I kept the list to a 10 so I can still revel in what’s left of my humility (hahaha). So. Think you’d want me to be YOUR housemate? First, show ME a list of YOUR reasons. :) In the meantime, Big Brother, could you be a dear and sign me up for the next season? PRETTY PLEASE? :)